"Crisis, change, all the myriad upheavals that blister the spirit and leave us groping-- they aren't voices simply of pain but also of creativity. and if we would only listen, we might hear such times beckoning us to a season of waiting, to the place of fertile emptiness."
"The fullness of one's soul evolves slowly. We're asked to go within to gestate the newness God is trying to form; we're asked to collaborate with Grace.
That doesn't mean that Grace isn't a gift. Nor does it mean that the deliberate process of waiting produces Grace. but waiting does provide the time and space necessary for Grace to happen. spirit needs a container to pour itself into. Grace needs an arena in which to incarnate. Waiting can be such a place, if we allow it."
~Sue Monk Kidd
taken from her book
"When The Heart Waits"
Broken Open...Part Two
(part one found here)
I burst into the house
My husband awaiting me there
My words were unrecognizable
My voice barely a whisper
my body shaking
I wanted to disappear
I longed to sink into the Blackness
I had not felt this way for a very long time
years
And the last time I did
I went "away" for a while
Lost inside myself
*
It took sometime
As the first reaction to such deep emotions
is the fight
But then I remembered
I remembered and recognized
My own Broken Open
Broken Open
Being Exactly how it sounds
like glass hitting the tile floor
The sound is startling
the impact painful
The dismembering frightening
*
But
in my memories
lay the Truth
And though
in those moments
I was uncertain about facing my day
Unsure about if I could face clients,
work,
the world
My memories took me
to the bottom of the Ocean
where Stillness and Calm reign
Where there was nothing to fear
Nothing to confuse
nothing to hurt
And it was there
in that Cathedral
where God came and sat with me
until I was ready to resurface
So in those memories
from years ago
I found strength
Strength enough to walk thru my day
Courage enough to not give in to the voices
Truth enough to know
All was happening as it should
My heart....broken
Widen open and exposed
Yet covered and held
And as my day went on
the tenderness of the Truth
allowed me to continue on....
...more to come
Love and Light
glass hitting the tile floor.. oh how i felt that. and then the ocean floor, like a calm drowning, taking in liquid like emotion, otherworldly. this is how this made me feel..protection so you could move through your day. amazing story, amazing process. xoxo
ReplyDeleteEchoing Glynis;)
ReplyDeleteWishing more strength dear one;)
Those 'broken places', the scarred tissue that surrounds those places is now much stronger, always giving added strength - "Strength enough to walk thru my day".
ReplyDeleteI'm hearing you.x
I can recognize the "waiting period". The slow process. The long waiting period. These lines speak to me-
ReplyDelete"Grace needs an arena in which to incarnate. Waiting can be such a place, if we allow it."
During this period, I feel that I was half fulfilled, half hidden from God. You can call it the transitional period-or the part two ...or the intersection of your life...or the turning point...whatever..this period of wait is necessary and we should not lose patience, neither question too much at this juncture...just embrace everything and wait { yet the urge to be healed should always be there }...wait for the transformation to begin...and after this long wait...we are healed. This is what I feel from my own experience. Thought I would share with you.
waiting for part 3..
Arms around you from afar holding you tight xxx
ReplyDeleteSharing a cup of tea with you talking talking talking
I can understand so much of what you explain here
Grace and strength and patience. I have a feeling you get "put back together" nicely. Love to you this gorgeous Saturday, Cat o' mine.
ReplyDeleteSo glad you resurfaced...then and now...sharing your journey empowers all of us. Today I needed to be reminded about Grace in the waiting, so thank you. You are a warrior woman with an empath heart!
ReplyDeleteOoooh Cat... I am trying to piece together why that negative energy from the office would hit you so hard and so deep... moving on to part 3... loves
ReplyDelete