Fireside Reflections found in Solitude...

aka honouring the Ebb and Flow

Here
is where I spent a lot of time last month
some in
Solitude...

I thought I would be writing...
working on my book
but there were other things in store
Sometimes
what we think we need to be doing
ends up not to be so
and what we think we shouldn't do
ends up to be
exactly
what
we
should 
do
this is what I call
Soul vs Goal
...so it was for me

As I write the story of my journey
back to myself
I walk through terrain
that once had a hold on me...
it had held me captive
from myself
from my truth
from my heart
and now
now to walk through those stories
heart in tact
I am free
free to feel
all that I need to feel
and so
I  feel...

the following is some of what I wrote on this
the day these photos were captured
my
Fireside Reflections
*

"How much grief can one person have?

This is the question I ask myself as I sit creek side

by the fire tears streaming down my face.

There has seemed to be so much I have needed to walk thru to Become.

In the bible it talks about how we must pass through the eye of a needle during our spiritual quest. The Egyptian ankh also indicates the same thing - passing to your spiritual self through an opening on the top of a cross. This passing thru takes intent. This passing thru requires awareness.

I have felt that perhaps I am still hold back here. I have been known to have great expectations on myself but truly I feel I need to show more...more of my soul. It is through soul we find the greatest connections and connections are a big part of who I am. In a world where we are taught to stand alone, depend on no one, you are the master of your destiny - the connection thing can be challenging. But a challenge I am willing to embrace.
So why the grief, why the tears?
Because Life offers life-death-life...a concept I am marinating in as I read "Women who Tun with the Wolves". And in death we find grief. Grief is the gift that comes along side death so we can face it, walk through it, let it wash over us and come out the other side.
Like many of you I have had my fair share of grief. It started from the moment I was born. My birth mother couldn't keep me and her grief was great-all consuming. So much so she left the hospital that night because she could not accept being in the same building as I was in, without being able to be with me.
I didn't have my own grief, I was a baby, innocent and completely in the hands of the Divine, cared for and loved, I knew nothing else.
But her grief had touched me-opened something in me and that helped me become the person I am today- and so my journey with grief began.
These moments or season of grief are like walking thru that eye of a needle-hard to do, but necessary to get to the other side. And though hard and sometimes feeling completely impossible, it is possible.
I feel there is a lot of grief in our world right now. Grief that has not been dealt with and that is what makes grief so debilitating- the not facing it- not walking through it- the not embracing it. Grief is a part of our human experience we cannot rid ourselves of it.
What we can do is walk ourselves through that eye and face it...get to know it...accept it.
Our souls, our hearts, are equipped to deal with grief...test them, push them, see what they got. I can assure you they will assist you in your journey.
And maybe you are someone who has not had to face Grief.
Then celebrate that-DON'T go looking for it, don't go creating it, celebrate and give gratitude for the life you live......

from my heart to yours

Love and Light