Night has fallen as we walk down to the water side.
A fire is lit and obstacles burned as we prepare to be taken on a journey inside.
We sit in a semi circle with our journey-guide at the crest.
We breathe.
Slowly and Deeply.
We cover our eyes with scarves as to withdraw from the world around us....
The drumming begins, methodic and steady.
I follow the sound of the drum and listen to my journey-guides instruction.
I envision a place where I associate with calm and safety....
The drum is beating.
I start feeling anxious about what if I do not meet my Spiritual Guide???? What does that say about me if no one shows up???? ahhhhhh
These thoughts play with me as I find myself at Sombrio Beach.
I breathe
I settle in
I know this place and its magic envelops me.
I feel the ground beneath my feet
I look up to see a large bird of prey circling above.
I look down to see my bare feet in the tall seaside grass
I look around to find myself in the forest edge, the ocean and sandy beach to my left and lush forest and tall grass to my right.
I breathe in Ocean Mother and the strong damp of The Rainforest floor and I begin to walk....still anxious about whether or not I am worthy of meeting my Spiritual Guide.
I am walking in the tall grass, on a path.
I think I see an Owl, but I dismiss it...too obvious I think to myself in my uncertainty.
The drum is beating...
I keep my mind and spirit open, readying myself to meet my Spiritual Guide. A special being who understands me at a very deep level and who has something to impart to me.....
I am told someone will come...be patient and trust.
I think I see a wolf, but dismiss it. Then I think I see my boys but dismiss it.
I begin to feel frustrated and so unsure of myself.
So I do the one thing I know that will and always has brought me clarity...
I leave the grass path and I walk out of the forest to Ocean Mother.
Being beside her always gives me peace and assurance.
I want to shake this doubt from me.
I calm my thoughts and breathe in Her truths.
The drum is beating...
I look up the beach thinking I see a bear....actually I see my boys with the bear....could it be?
I struggle with the doubt that creeps around me.
I turn to Ocean Mother for peace of mind, again I breathe Her in deeply and Trust wraps herself around me, and She helps me silence the doubts, clearing the muddied waters.
The drum beats louder...
I look up to see the Eagle still circling above.....finally it comes down to see me.
Standing in front of me he allows me to hold him close and pet him.
I can feel his feathers, each one individually, as a stroke his magnificent head.
I know this is not natural for him.
He is doing this for me.
He is regal and so assured.
His rightful place is in the heavens, but he has come down because he knows it is what I needed.
He has come to let me know that I am right where I need to be.
Ocean Mother whispers "Trust" as she caresses the sandy shore line.
I want to stay here forever with him...with her.
This is when the Eagle says to me, " I am always with you Catherine."
I get up to go....but before I do that I thank the Eagle...I thank the Ocean....I thank God
And as I walk back to the fire, I am filled with blessing and gratitude.
The drum is no more.
Doubt
Self Doubt
How it holds us back.
And yet all we need is placed inside of us, the moment our lives began.
And even in my self doubt, I am given sign after sign after sign...what Patience, what Love.....what Grace.
Self Doubt is something that I face, sometimes on a daily basis.
But it does not get the best of me, as it once did.
I look at it
I say hi (my mom taught me to always be polite)
and then when the times is right, I say "till we meet again" , and I continue down the amazing path that has been laid our before me.
There are always chances given, always new opportunities arise, it is never to late, never to late to believe.
Stop
Breathe
Take a look around you
Where do you see Love?
Where do you see Truth?
Can you hear the drums?
Love and Light
As I read your post, it affects my physically, I hear the drum, the ocean,I feel the breeze, I pet the eagle and feel his feathers. I love how your experience was a "native" journey - the fire, the drums, the animals, creation - amazing! I realized when reading your posts that the uncertainty I feel is not a bad thing - its not because I am doubting what I know or who God is or what I am supposed to do - its a good uncertainty - I am on the edge of something big, something I haven't totally known yet, but something great. Just like that divine prayer "May God raise our expectations to what He is truly capable of and may we experience the most unrelenting, overwhelming breeze of his unfailing unconditional, incomprehensible love". Thank you for stepping into your role as Messenger, your are blessing us with your insight, wisdom and experiences.
ReplyDeleteCat, I'm so glad you linked up at "Storytellers!" This is a unique and lovely story--gripping and mysterious, full of beautiful imagery and an encouraging message. Thank you for sharing, and so nice to meet you!
ReplyDelete--Sadee
Hi Cat. I followed this link from Boho Girl....and I'm so glad I did....I'm starting SouLodge tomorrow and this is exactly what I needed to read today....thank you.
ReplyDelete