all images and stories are the property of Catherine Beerda-Basso and are not to be used without given permission...thank you

Friday 9 December 2011

Storytelling...

(silent retreat, where I filled this journal)


Healing
that is what writing was for me
a way to process things I did not have the skill to process
A place to put thoughts when I had no where to put them...
a place of my own
a world of my own
a voice of my own


(silent retreat)


Stacks of journals...all sorts
have filled up my life
always there waiting for me
to pour in the latest heart ache or the most recent victory
offering a place of quiet perspective
and reflection


...the following is taken from a journal...1997


I wish I could draw
but
I cannot
so I draw with words
and 
the words I write
paint a picture and
bring to life the stories
I tell 

The stories are not fiction
but of the true story 
of love
loss
and hope.
These are the things I speak of
These are the pictures I paint
Beautiful...
and alive.

I've been in a place
a place where Sean
lives.
It's been beautiful
chaotic 
and confusing
It's been addicting
passionate 
and moving
It's been real 
and 
true
 ~CB


(this years birthday present)


The girl with the camera
That is who I have always been...
Some seasons more than others
But definitely part of my identity


There is something about a moment
and capturing it
holding in forever in a image
and that image evoking the senses
bringing you back to that place in time
seemingly forgotten


(early morning on my back deck)


These two forms of expression have become more and more intentional as I grow into myself
(a nice way of saying growing older)
Both have become like children I am nurturing into adulthood
Both becoming more public...



(silent retreat)


And like any form of expression
it can leave me feeling vulnerable and exposed
as I write out my heart
but yet
the fulfilment
the excitement
the connection I feel
far surpasses the feeling
of nakedness and exposure.

Poems From The Bar Stool 1996
May 1-96

Music pumping-vibrations moving thru the air lifting the laughter higher. Voices overlapping in the back ground making the sense of things dim if not non-existent.

The bodies flow in and out faceless bodies I know nothing of yet they resemble me in more ways then I care to admit. the sound and smell of them lingers even after they leave.

It it goes on past the point I will reach back and know I am sane. i will pull my head above the mire and breath the fresh air once again. Sweet to taste ~ Sweet to smell.

I am all that exists between the world of reality and external uncertainty ~ I choose reality ~ I choose the way of the rich ~ Rich in life for that is my destiny.

Through the smoke filled room I see this. Beyond the music I hear it. A sound like that of an angels voice beckoning me to walk ~ walk down the road which is real an be ever true to what and who I am.

CB

joining Sadee here

Love and Light

side note: my plan was to photograph all my journals, but that proved to be a little more of a time consumer than I was able to give so instead I pulled two random journals from which I shared...




7 comments:

  1. Beautiful, as always :). I especially like this: "the fulfilment
    the excitement
    the connection I feel
    far surpasses the feeling
    of nakedness and exposure."

    Like you, I've always been a journal-er and it's felt a little weird this past year as I've begun to blog--to let others read my journal too! Thank you for linking every week, Cat--your writing about strength and bravery is very encouraging to me!

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  2. i love this. :) i have stacks and stacks of journals. it's funny; you posted an excerpt from one of your journals in '97. that's when i began my first journal--i was seven years old. my how the time has passed... writing was healing for me too, so day after day after day i came back to my journal, pouring my heart into the pages... i don't write in a paper journal very much anymore; blogging has kind of become my journal. lately i have picked up my old journal again though...as i have been treading through some waters that i haven't wanted to plaster on a public computer screen.

    and i love your pictures. i have often wished that i was a good photographer. there's something magical about capturing images. if i had time, i would learn. for now i just enjoy the talents of others. :)

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  3. Really like 'growing into myself', that feels exactly like what I am doing :)

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  4. It is lovely to see a glimpse of your past, knowing to a certain degree how things have unfolded for you...choosing the way of those "rich in life" and following the angels voice to walk down the road, being true to who you are...you have done this and it is beautiful!

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  5. It's great that you're nurturing your writing and photography. I love how God - the Great Artist and Creator - has given us that desire to create and make beauty too. ♥

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  6. oh this is so lovely and haunting! keep living, feeling, telling your stories. everyone's eyes are so important, because there is a way only you see life, and i need to see it through your eyes sometimes.

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Your voice is welcome here, your connection appreciated. Love and Light