Mondays Offering...Endure

It was Mothers Day yesterday...

I would love to report a beautiful story

but that would not be the truth.

The ebb and flow felt like a wild river

with fast flowing rapids

while the occasional peaceful pool  

waited to hold me close at the earth's shore.

This morning I read this beautiful, heartfelt post

and it was exactly what I needed to read

it allowed the grief and regret 

 to rise the top and be acknowledged. 

It gave me a word to help find my focus

Endure  

On Saturday I received the sad news

that one of my mom's has been diagnoised

with a rare form of blood cancer

only 23 cases in NorthAmerica

That on the heels of being out for dinner with a girlfriend

on Monday and speaking with her

about her diagnosis

of cancer.

She

43

a mama of two

a wife and a daughter 

to a mama who lives with her.

Two very dear women in my life

two kinds of journeys

two kinds of fights 

I will be what it is

they need me to be.

and in this grief

of what is

I can and will  
Endure 

so they can do the same.

We had a luncheon here yesterday

My mom

My oldest with his dad

my husband

my youngest

The youngest was grumpy

and out of sorts

due to two late nights

and the oldest

well

the oldest lives in his own world right now

and yesterday

yesterday I lost my rooting

I had a hard time holding on to the steady of my resolve

I felt bashed around between hard rocks

as cold water tossed me about

my head hurt

my heart sank

yesterday I did not feel my own strength

it was lost to me.

But in the dawn of this new day

I realize

I see

and I remember

my strength once again

and slowly today

I will work through my regret 

and feel my roots again.

I

Endure.

All was not lost

there was the peaceful pools

there was love felt

thoughts of friends from afar

danced in my heart this weekend

Fondness and memories

Thank you friend

I love you.

A marriage strong

love deep

an appreciation of one another

consideration

friendship

a unity of steadfast love

and commitment

Thank you husband

I love you

A night at a best friends

years of roads traveled

making together the most comfortable thing

laughter

sharing

planning

Sisters of the Heart

Thank you friend   

I love you

A gathering of Sisters
 always feeding the Soul
grounding ones psyche
Thank you my Sisters of Light
I love you  

A little voice
calling from the bedroom

mama I am sorry

mama please

mama will you make eggs in the morning?

mama will you forgive me

mama I love you

yes baby

I know you are sorry

go to sleep now, you are tired

yes baby

I will make eggs in the morning

Of course I forgive you

you are just tired

go to sleep now

I love you

Endure

my lovelies

Endure

as only we, as women, can.

now I am off to make some eggs.....

Love and Light