At the end of our short, partially gravelled road, was the town graveyard.
The going joke was that we lived on a dead end.
One might think that living by a cemetery would be creepy; but I spent alot of time there as a young girl. I loved walking up and down the rows, getting to know those who resided there. They were mysterious neighbors and I felt a sense of peace when I walk amongst them. The only place that slightly disturbed me was one area where the graves had sunken deep into the ground...and the children's section made me sad....I can still remember some of their names.
Part of the graveyard's perimeter gave way to a steep embankment that went down to a forest line and then
the industrial section of town. This made a great toboggan hill in the winter and a great hide out place in the summer. This is where my story begins.
I am there, on the back hill, walking the trails, when I see a hole in the side of the hill. I know this is the place I enter to start my journey. I am a child as I enter the hole.
Immediately my subconscious wants to know what is going on so it tries to take me some where familiar...
...but I resist. I have come to learn, I don't need familiar to feel safe. Both places flash before my eyes as if there is a battle of wills. But I want to learn new things, I want to embrace the part of me that is the "Trusting Fool" I want to be here, in a new space, and be okay with that. I find myself in a forest, rich and green. Trees tower above me and giant ferns grow all around me. The colours are alive.
The forest is still and at peace. The Great Magic is here.
I stand on a hill side and at the bottom of the hill I see a small sparkling lake into which a water fall is pouring into. And there beside the lake I see a white unicorn and above it 5 white doves fly in a circle.
I shake my head in disbelief..."Really?" I say out loud to whomever is listening.
I look again and now not only is the Unicorn and doves still there, I notice there is an arched rainbow over the waterfall.
|(image found here)|
I am feeling so much. I can hear the drums and they are calling me to run. But all I can think about is getting down to the lake, getting down to business, as I realize the lake is my destination.
Suddenly the Unicorn is there with me.
"Are you really here for me?" I ask
"Yes, I am. Now, go run and play." He nudges me with his nose to go and run in the trails.
Fun? Fun? I think to myself...but I have so many questions, I have come here with a purpose. I have medicine to gather, things to figure out.
But, of course He already knows all this and so much more.
At this point I am an essence of myself and much too serious. I want to the full me, running. I want to feel the fullness of my person now. It takes some time, but it eventually comes to be me running through the trails...not an essence of me, not the child in me, but the whole of me running, running, running in complete freedom and joy.
I catch a glimpse of a Grizzly Bear watching me from the ferns, and a little while later I see a Wolf.
I still have a strong desire to get down to the lake, but the Unicorn tells me this my time to have run, to run free of all burdens, all that weighs on my heart, all that I insist on carrying around with me. And so I do. A smile is on my face and I feel a wonderful sense of lightness and freedom. I feel giddy.
|(note: this is a brown bear, not a Grizzly)|
Suddenly, the Grizzly is in my path way and he stops me in my tracks - not to frighten me but to give me medicine, to give me guidance. He tells me to Trust the Stillness, to Trust my strength. He is firm and direct with me, his medicine being of the outmost importance. And though he is firm, he is loving and kind...He pours into me for quite sometime.
After he is finished he releases me back to the drums - back to the forest and the running with the wind...and before I know it I am running with a pack of female Wolves.
They are beautiful, strong, intuitive and committed....committed to me. They are my pack, I belong to them. They know themselves, they know who they are and so it is with me in their presence. What they feel, I feel. I need not be afraid of what's inside me, and they challenge me in this. They push me to go deeper, run faster, keep going...and so we run...
I am not sure how much time passes, as the elder plays the drum, but eventually I find myself at the lake side. I am there with The Unicorn, the Doves...and someone I have been looking for......
(Stay tuned...as the journey continues)
Love and Light
(ps don't forget to enter my book giveaway here)